Milk的部落格

(English is below) 你永遠不知道生命是如何為你人生鋪陳。

當我一確定這次去泰國將會是四個月時，照片上的這個朋友突然聯繫我，談完正事後，他邀請我去他故鄉一趟，一開始我只安排了兩天，但因為一些簽證的問題，原計畫被迫更改，想下一步的同時，我需要找尋落腳處（因為錢開始變得需要非常謹慎的使用）我問他是否可以待一個禮拜，他很爽快地直接答應說沒有問題，即使有先告知他我當時的心理狀況（有點差），他的態度依然很正向，就這樣這個禮拜療癒了大部分的低潮時光。

我們聊天幾乎跟「愛自己」這個話題都有沾上邊，她總會先聽我說，然後為了協助我看得更清楚更深入，她會問一些問題，除此之外，也會跟我分享一些正向且讓人印象深刻的故事。

我記得在我結束寺廟禪修體驗的當天，我們坐在河邊聊天，我跟他分享走路冥想時的啟發：「我發現這幾年來不斷的追逐與試圖落實「愛自己」，其實一部分早已落實，因為保持運動習慣、健康飲食與近每天的內觀練習，是我為了自己的內在平衡及身體健康所堅持的！如果不愛自己，也不會做這些努力，所以我值得拍拍自己的肩膀並對自己說：『嘿 Betty，你做得很棒且正走在正確的道上，記得繼續加油』

剛好在前一天，她問：「你有具體的榜樣嗎？」，我當時回覆他某兩個她也認識的朋友，但在河邊對話的時候，我告訴他他現在也是我的榜樣之一，突然我意識到，他們之間的共通點是自信地做自己，以至於他們散發出專屬自己的獨特魅力。說著說著我眼淚掉了下來，因為這些都是打從心底的話，我真心希望有一天我可以散發出專屬自己的魅力，她抱了我一下然後為我加油著

這個片刻如此的美與動人

在離開的前一天，我剛好有跟他外婆獨處的時間，雖然我沒有辦法總是100%的用泰文表達我想說的，但是我們聊天總是能瞭解彼此，這一天他對我說：「你就像我的孫女一樣，所以如果有一天你來泰國沒有地方住，那就來這裡跟我住一起」

騰縣是位於南邦府的一個縣市，我覺得非常感恩這輩子能作她的朋友，也很感謝他與他的外婆提供一個禮拜的住宿及熱情款待。

當回頭看整個旅程時，不禁讓人覺得驚訝，八月時的臨時聯絡，看起來好像是生命為了讓我更認識這位朋友並向她學習所做的提前安排。

You never know what life would bring to you. 

As soon as I knew I wanted to travel in Thailand for 4 months, my friend contacted me and invited me to her hometown. In the beginning, I would only visit her for 2 days, but due to some issues with my visa, my trip plan had changed and it has brought me some tough time besides some other circumstances. I asked if I could stay for a week and she was amazingly nice to me to say yes.
My mental state actually was not in a right place in that moment but with her warm welcomes and positive influences, I healed so much. 

While I was there, we talked a lot about selflove. She listened to me and asked questions to help me see clearly/deeply in mind. She shared her stories sometimes and all was impressive and inspiring. 

I remember the day after finishing the meditation retreat. We sat beside the river and I told her I just realized “I do care and love myself, otherwise, I won’t do exercise, eat healthy and meditate nearly every morning. I think I kind of deserve to tap my shoulder and say hey Betty. You actually do a good job and you are on the correct path! Just keep going’ 

Also, (the day before this day, she just asked me who my role model was so she could understand what type of person I actually would like to become) I told her she would be my role model too and all of the sudden, I realized the common character that I admire between them is how they are confident and shine brightly as who they are. I cried because these words coming from my deep mind. This moment was so touching and beautiful. She gentlely gave me a hug and encouraged me. 

One day before I left, there was a little moment I’ve spent some time with her grandma. Even I couldn’t express myself 100% in Thai, grandma always was friendly to me and we could understand each other. In the end, she told me ‘if one day you would come to Thailand again and no place to stay, you can come stay with me. You are like my grandchild.’

Thoen is a beautiful small town in Lampang province. I am extremely grateful I can know her as a friend in my life and appreciate her and her grandma’s welcome and a week hosting. 

When I looked back, just felt so interesting that she contacted me in August suddenly and it seems all was for these memorable moments I’ve spent with her and the attitudes that I should learn from her.